Costa D'Angelo

In an ocean of lapping uncertainty, the desire to tell stories guided Costa “like a lighthouse.” We talk a lot about what he’s learned to embrace: failure, fear, the unknown, and now chaos, following the debut of his character, Alex, in Hulu’s final season of Tell Me Lies. Throughout our conversation, his process is the beacon he pulls toward as he talks of the sensory work he did to become Alex. With each memory written in his notebook, each corner of Alex’s room explored, and every song added to his playlist, he heard himself ready to say, “Go ahead, turn the lights off.” And if this season of Tell Me Lies is anything, it’s dark.

Alex meets the cast as a drug dealer on campus, whom Bree [Cat Missal] recognises as her foster brother from childhood, before their separation. Sharing a traumatising past with Bree, he also finds what he believes to be a trauma bond with Lucy [Grace Van Patten]. Costa describes Alex’s role as a “protector” who is desperate for others not to feel the pain he has felt. And while Alex serves as Bree’s protector, Costa serves as Alex’s, speaking with devout passion about his character’s inner world. From his backyard to drama school theatres, to now a much larger stage, I look forward to who in the world Costa chooses to become next.

Tell Me Lies season three is now streaming on Hulu.

Hi! How was the shoot? I heard such great things from the team!
It was electric! We ran around the city and basically made a movie. It was so cool.

That is so good to hear! How is your week going so far?
It's great. It's been so busy. I've been flying up and down. I'm shooting a Netflix show at the moment. It's all crazy, but it's so amazing. I'm embracing all the chaos. I had a night shoot last night, which is why I just woke up. We got home so late, and I slept for a few hours, but I had a few coffees, so I'm good.

Pushing through! I wanted to start with some getting-to-know-you questions, based on themes in the show. Bree, having been in the foster system like Alex, is trying to remember what she was like as a child. When you think back to what you were like as a child, how would you describe yourself?
As a child, I was kind of crazy, but also really unsure about what my life was going to be. I knew I wanted to be an actor, but it was so “all or nothing” since I was a kid. I wanted to be an actor. That was my thing. I put a lot of pressure on myself from really early on. I made a promise to myself that I'd become an actor, and I would do anything to see it through. I was a bit of a troublemaker in school. I had to make a choice early on to move schools, go to art school, and actually commit to acting when I was sixteen. If I stayed where I was, I would continue hanging around the wrong crowds. I was young, confused, and unsure, but I had one lighthouse, which was the desire to be a performer.

How has the self-pressure changed as you have gotten older?
I think there's still an expectation of myself to keep going and to keep telling stories, but I feel like I’ve finally come to a point in my life, for the first time ever, where I don't have to justify my career and my love for performing. I don't have to prove myself to anyone but myself. I’ve worked so hard, and now I don't really have to explain. I can just say, “This is what I do.” But that pressure is always going to be there. Still being so young, I have achieved something that I’m really proud of. I just want to keep going and continue telling stories. I've been doing that since I was young, even if I was dressed in front of my friends and family in a tiny theatre. Now I just get to do it on a bigger scale, so it’s the same mission.

What are your first memories of storytelling? It could even just be playing dress up.
I used to play this game with my cousins when I was really young—we used to call it “Superheroes” or the "Be Anyone Game.” We'd run around my backyard, and we'd all be superheroes or whoever, and we'd have to describe our costumes and weapons. We'd run around the backyard fighting off imaginary monsters. I remember that we could just do that for hours, and we truly believed every second of it. We’d go on a trampoline and jump around, do flips, and fight off the boss battles. It's crazy because I'm doing the same thing now. That is important for me—keeping that childlike energy on set. You've got to perform and believe it. None of it's real, but you have to convince yourself it is, live it, and tell the truth. I had some good practice early on doing all that stuff. Maybe one day, I'll play a superhero.

I also remember getting involved in theatre super young and being so nervous to be on stage in front of an audience. It was so scary, but what a feeling when you do it. That fear never left me. That fear now comes through differently, and I trust myself in a different way. That's what gets me through it. I trust my work, and I trust the work I've put in. But those butterflies in my stomach…they never leave. That’s such a beautiful thing to have.

Let’s talk a bit more about that feeling. In the show, Alex helps Lucy through a panic attack by showing her the tapping technique. Do you have any rituals that help you through that feeling?
You've got to use it, you know? I have a ritual that I do before everything. It's just like an athlete warms up. Actors need to warm up, too. You can’t just show up and expect that you’re going to get there. I use music as a process. I made a curated playlist for Alex. So, as I’m getting ready in the morning, while I’m on set, while I’m in my trailer, I’m doing relaxation techniques. It’s like meditation. You kind of have to reset your mind and body. Then I'm playing this music, and I do sensory work.

I haven't ever told anyone this, but I created a book, and it's filled with images and stories from Bree and Alex's childhood before they left each other. Everything I did as Alex was for Bree. So I listen to these songs that remind me of Bree, and then I'll look at the book, read through it, touch the photos, and think about those memories they had together. You have to make them real. Then you can go to the set, and it’s all there. Now I can do a scene with Grace [Van Patten] or Cat [Missal], and it's just easy. It’s there for you if you need it. We've seen Alex have his heart hurt by Lucy, and it goes back to his childhood when he says, “I’m not a bad person.” All of that comes from his childhood, because he doesn't want to become the people who abused him. So, when I do my process and make that real, it's so easy for me to go into that dark place.

I want to ask more about the sensory work later, but I do want to first talk more about the playlist. I listened to it and was curious to know the process of curating it.
The playlist really changed as I learned more about Alex. If you look at the first few songs, it's a lot of Radiohead, Pearl Jam, and Alice in Chains. It's quite angry, loud, and chaotic. That's how I initially looked at Alex in those first few episodes. I read the scripts and saw that he’s got quite a resentment against the world. As we started to learn more about him, and I read the scripts, I started to find songs that were really sad and gentle. I discovered so much more about Alex as we went on. There's a song called “Look on Down From The Bridge” by Mazzy Star. Alex really starts to have his soul taken away from him, piece by piece. It's really tragic. And of course, I had Cat Missal’s beautiful music in there as well, just to remind me of her, because at the end of the day, Bree is the only reason Alex keeps going. So, hearing her voice really helped me.

When I was listening to it, the feeling of profound alienation and isolation really stayed with me. The playlist almost makes you feel like you’re floating out of your body, detached from yourself.
100%, exactly right. That's so much of who Alex is. He floats through life, and he's got these rules that he establishes to survive. His dream in life is to go through life and never hurt a single soul. He’s a protector. People say, “Well, he's a drug dealer.” But he would never allow anyone to take any drugs that could hurt them. He would make sure all of his stuff is pure. He thinks, “If someone is going to do drugs, maybe I’ll just sell them, and people will be okay.” It was important for me to justify all his actions. Everything comes from a place of protection, but unfortunately, hurt people hurt people, and he doesn’t realise who he is becoming. When the lines blur with Lucy, he struggles because he believes he's becoming that thing he doesn’t want to be, but he's so intoxicated by Lucy. That's why we inevitably see his heart break. The playlist helped so much, I would immediately click in after hearing the first few notes of “Nutshell” by Alice in Chains.

I want to go back to the sensory work; I was talking to someone else who said they did sensory work even on set, and physically felt around. Was this part of your work?
Yeah, I would spend hours in Alex's room by myself while people set up. My only advice for anyone who wants to become an actor is to be unapologetic about your process on set. Everyone is there to serve each other and to serve a story. If you're in your room, spend time there, sleep there overnight if you can. Do whatever you can. That’s how I felt in Alex’s room. He's lived there for however long. He's got all these books, he's got all this music, he's got everything. That's who he is. That's his home.

I was in there touching and feeling everything. I would lie in bed while the cameras were being set up. I listened to the music that he had in his room. I read the comic books beside his bed. You have to know that space back to front, because it's your room. You know your room. Tessa, if you closed your eyes right now, you'd know how to get around your space. You'd know everything. As an actor, that's so important. You have to be so comfortable in your element. You're in your church there. Great sets and crews allow you to do that. The Tell Me Lies crew was incredible. They were so understanding of the way we all worked and the way I wanted to approach Alex.

Is there anything you feel acting school prepared you most for being on a set? And then, on the flip side, is there anything you feel you could have only learned through experience?
Acting school was so important to me. I was immersed for five years around other actors. I learned to fail over and over and over again. Failure is so important, and I've failed a lot. I've had a ten-year stint of no real screen time and no acting outside of the theatre in school, where I failed all the time. You have to just learn to embrace failure and follow it. Learning that was so good because then, when you get to set, if you're trying to get it perfect, and that's all you're thinking about, you're never going to have the freedom to discover and to find that electricity. Things are electric when you just don't know what's going to happen next. On set, it’s so important to embrace the fear and embrace maybe even not knowing the next line. Embrace not knowing if you're going to throw the object or if you're going to run up and push the person. That's where all the best work comes from.

And something that I learned from being on set rather than in school is embracing chaos. A set is chaotic. People are running around to make sure it runs smoothly. I think, “What do I have to do here to prepare for this scene while everything is going wrong?” And I had to get used to performing when everyone is watching you. You’ve just got to connect with your person and be there. Grace was so incredible. She's such an incredible dance partner in that way that it felt like it was just us. It was like, “No one else exists at this moment. It’s just you and me.”

In learning to embrace not knowing what you will do next, is there anything you did as Alex that surprised you as Costa?
There's a moment in episode six where Alex and Lucy have this confrontation about Stephen and about what's going on. It's in Alex's room, and I just remember it being the first time since he was in foster care that he opened up to someone about his abuse. I just remember when that line came out, "I'm not a bad person,” I was just kind of...reduced to that boy again. I felt like a kid in that moment in the way it came out of me. He felt like a child needing to be loved. Those are the things that you can't really plan. I was surprised by that. There’s also been a big response to people seeing that, especially since Alex puts on such a character in the outside world. In that moment, he was reduced to that little boy in foster care.

That line delivery was really touching when I watched it. One conversation that I really liked this season was between Bree and Wrigley, and they're both saying, like, “I hate when people say it's gonna be okay. Sometimes it’s not okay. It probably won’t be.” I feel like Alex and Lucy have a similar conversation physically. Even though it maybe wasn’t written as an intentional parallel, it felt that way to me.
Megan [Oppenheimer], our showrunner, is just incredible at telling the harsh realities of life, love, and heartbreak. Sometimes people don't get happy endings. And what do you do? Sometimes you can work your whole life to get out of a place to create your dream life, but one person may come in, and the heart does what it wants sometimes.

You researched the psychological impact the foster system has on children. Can you tell me more about that? What particularly struck you?
I did a lot of work with my coach, Lisa Robertson, who's incredible. We did a deep dive into the differences in American foster systems, particularly from Australia. It was important for me to understand how these poor kids survive and get through it, like Alex, who made it to college and found his way out. Something that struck me reading it, which was quite heartbreaking, was that a lot of these homes keep the bed sheets in the plastic that goes over the beds because these children will often pee the bed. They’re afraid to sleep. Reading that was such an eye-opening thing because I could never imagine what Alex would have gone through, especially in a group home.

That protective nature he has over Bree informed everything, because the place where they came from is so unimaginable and horrific that he would do anything to protect her. When they were separated, and he finally saw her at college, why did he never go up to her? He would have seen her from a distance and kept an eye on her, but he never went up to her because he wanted to protect her from bringing back that trauma. He saw her with her friends, and from an outside point of view, he thought, “Okay, she's finally happy. Why would I bring up this trauma? She might not even remember me.” Maybe for Alex, it was selfish, but he just needed to be with her again. It all stems from the abuse he faced. I tried to tell the story as truthfully as possible and not make it a token.

Yeah, and I think we see that even though Alex had thought that Bree may have finally been happy, a trauma like that doesn’t just go away. There is not much of a mental escape. She has forgotten a lot of things as a trauma response.
Yeah, her body and brain were protecting her from remembering all that stuff. There's a reason your brain will block out those kinds of things when you're facing trauma or grief. Alex’s way of dealing with it is very different. He sets up rules in his life so that he’ll never become what hurt him. There’s a moment with Lucy that was so intentional from Megan and our directors. It’s when Lucy comes back to his apartment in the first half of the season, the first time. Alex immediately removes his hands from Lucy's hips as soon as she says, “Well, do you want me to be here?" As soon as Alex senses even an ounce of doubt, he lets her go with no guilt, and he removes his hands, because he cannot…that's his worst fear. He thinks, “You can come home with me, we can have fun, but the minute you don’t want to be here, there’s no pressure, you can go.” In studying psychology, maybe he can help people someday.

You mentioned the rules he sets for himself. So I wanted to ask you, is there any acting rule of your own that you either followed or broke throughout filming?
Ooh, let me think. In acting, there shouldn't be any rules, you know? There are no rules. If you can look after your scene partner and have an understanding, there shouldn't really be any rules in terms of performance. I think, for me, it was just kind of giving myself permission to go to those dark places and to explore and to really feel comfortable with Grace on set. That takes time. I was entering a new space with a cast that was established, so I also didn't want to force myself into that established cast and culture. But I also knew that I had to. Alex is also very unapologetic in his approach to life. So I had to be that way as well. In a way, life imitates art, especially with character.

Alex doesn't really know this group of people, and as Costa, I was friends with the cast as time went on, but sometimes it's important that there's a difference in the cast. I am the outsider. I could embrace that in a way, because I actually was the outsider. I was a new guy entering this established machine. Coming into that, I was nervous, but also excited. Using those feelings that Costa had for Alex really helped me.

That makes a lot of sense. I didn't even think about it that way. So then maybe it’s less of a black and white switch off between Alex and you as a person.
Yeah, I guess it depends on what scene I'm shooting. Particularly in scenes between Lucy and Alex, I thought it was very important not only to serve the performance but to do it in a way that served the community—there are real foster children out there who have grown up and have made it and see themselves in Alex. It would be a disservice not to fully commit to that on the day of those performances because you only get to play a character for a few months. Every day, you're going to give it everything. If I have to come to set that day and kind of be to myself a little bit, and protect my energy to save it for those scenes, I will, because I'm serving a character first and foremost. Some days, it's a bit more fun. We've got a few really enjoyable party scenes, and we had a good laugh!

Now that it's out, are you having people who resonate with Alex share their stories with you?
Yeah, I'm really grateful for that. I've received a lot of kind words about people going through similar things, which I will keep private. I'm extremely grateful for those people who have reached out. What a blessing that is to have your work resonate with people who see themselves in him.

I think it’s also a storyline that we don’t see too often in the media.
Yeah, and that all comes from the top. Megan set the tone. That's why I wanted to really, really, really do this show and work with her because I would follow her to the end of the earth. She is so fierce in her storytelling, and we took this show to some dark and vulnerable places. Especially with a lot of the nudity and the sex scenes, you're not only just doing sex scenes, but there's so much baggage that comes with those scenes. It's not just about taking your clothes off and performing. There's a weight to every movement, every kiss. It's like untapped territory that we get to explore. You don't get to really see characters like him often on screen.

You've done such a fantastic job, genuinely. Alex is so compelling to watch. At the beginning, I thought, “Wow, I can’t get a read on him.” Normally, I feel like you could kind of tell what a character’s arc may be, but his was kept so close to the chest. I am so excited for the finale!
Well, that's the best thing. That's how Alex lives his life. He doesn't let people in. I couldn't let the audience in yet either. He can't show the audience what he's feeling. It's been such an incredible journey, seeing where he starts and where he ends up in his life. Alex is a closed book to most people, and the only people he opens up to are those who are trauma-bonded with him. He knows that they're cut from the same cloth. He initially laughs Lucy off, thinking she’s just a college girl. But the reason he starts to fall for her is that he learns that she was potentially abused as well. He starts to want to protect her. We'll see what happens when he finds out that it wasn't all true.

Oh God, I can't wait for that. Before we go, I want to ask you one last thing—what are you feeling most excited about at the moment?
Well, I'm currently filming this Netflix show, and it's one of the most incredible projects I've ever had the privilege of being in. We have such a beautiful team that believes in this thing so much. I'm just so excited to share it with the world. It looks incredible. It's got so much heart. Every single person who's a part of the show has given absolutely everything to it. We've bled for this thing, we've cried. It's so beautiful, I can't wait to share it with the world. It's a hockey show for Netflix, and it's going to be really special, really different, really tragic, and amazing.

I cannot wait to see it! Congratulations on everything, and best of luck with everything going forward! It was so nice to talk to you.
Thank you, Tessa. It was such a pleasure. I hope we get to do this again. We'll make it happen. Such amazing questions.